As people learn more about the differences in our personalities, we see a lot more being written about it, enabling us to understand others’ point of views. Which is very important for humans as we battle through life, cohabiting in close proximities and constantly making new acquaintances.
I don’t speak for all introverts, obviously, as we’re not all of one mind. So this post is based on my opinion, and conclusions, that I’ve gathered from being an introvert in an extroverted world.
What do I wish people understood about introverts? Well…
They are perfectly fine at home
In fact, there is nowhere else they would rather be. So, don’t feel sorry for someone you think spends a lot of time inside. If they’re an introvert, they probably couldn’t be happier to spend some time re-charging at home on their days off, especially if they work in a social environment.
I work in retail and have to dish out customer service all day, which is extremely tiring. My home is my sanctuary; it’s where I long to go after a hard day, and where I want to stay after a week of work.
It can be a little intimidating when people ask us introverts what we’ve been up to, and we don’t want to come across as lazy.
Just because we stayed at home reading a book on days off, instead of going hiking and cycling and brunching, doesn’t mean we don’t have fun in life or that we “need to get out more”.
Forcing someone to be social causes unnecessary anxiety
This is one of my pet peeves, and one I had to inform my extroverted partner on straight away. Perhaps it’s the stubborn side of me that feels this way, but if someone tries to force me into doing something I don’t want to do, especially regarding a social event/situation, I will not be happy with them and I certainly will not agree to go.
There is a fine line between telling an introvert that you want them with you for their lovely company, and harassing them to be there. Trying to convince someone when they have turned you down is really unfair, because all that’s happened is that the person now feels uncomfortable and says they’ll go to stop being harassed. Introverts like to be invited to stuff even if they don’t intend to go – they will come if they really want to!
Making friends is not easy
Introverts who don’t particularly enjoy people’s company, find it really hard to make friends (shocker). Therefore, it’s nice when an extrovert gives us an opportunity to be social should we want to, and when they kind of adopt us.
Saying that, I have had extroverts try to be friends with me but sometimes the connection just isn’t there. Introverts I think, more so that extroverts, want real bonds with those who understand who they are.
Clingy and intense friends are not usually our jam… and I’m not trying to sound like a wounded animal here, but I get freaked when an enthusiastically social and outdoorsy extrovert tries to befriend me!
Nonetheless, we greatly appreciate people’s kindness, and offers of friendships when it naturally develops.
They probably prefer animal companionship
A lot of us find socialising with people to be draining, and sometimes outright unenjoyable. To me, it really is a chore to hang out with people I don’t know, and all I want to do is be at home with my cat.
Whether extroverts understand it or not, human interaction just isn’t high on our list of priorities, but having animals in our lives is.
An introvert might genuinely enjoy your company but will still need their own space, so try not to take that personally.
They wish the world was more introvert-friendly
Everything about our existence revolves around being social nowadays. So much so that I reveled during our two covid lockdowns! You have no idea how happy I was not to see anyone except my partner and cat for weeks at a time.
Some of the extroverted annoyances we have to deal with are; calls. Why can’t you text?! Face-to-face meetings, umm that could have gone in an email. Hang out at the pub? Please, what about picking out books from the library, or a picnic at the park.
Zoom and working from home have really been a blessing for introverts, but I think even extroverts have benefited from some of these changes that covid and social distancing have brought about too.
They’re not broken, or weird
It is estimated that 25% to 40% of the world is introverted, yet it seems that there is still a misconception that introverts are weird. But just as I have mentioned, it is hard for us to make friends in the conventional way, because we don’t like going out to the pub, or take part in social hobbies.
We may like to stay home with indoor hobbies, and yeah, we may come across as the outsider but that doesn’t mean we’re odd. We just take pleasure in different things! And that is okay.
Alright, I guess that’s all I wish people understood about introverts.
If you’re an extrovert, do you realise how hard some of everyday situations are for introverts to deal with? And if you’re an introvert, is there anything else you would add to this list?
Until Next Time,